Hello 2012! Maybe, this year, I’ll attempt “resolutions”.

I usually don’t have resolutions. They don’t work with me. Unless I’m ready to resolute something, ready to commit to it or what not, nothing will make me do what I don’t want to do. HOWEVER, this year, I will attempt it! I feel like 2012, if any, is the year to make promises to myself. We shall have two categories!

Obtainable Category:

• The “10 Minutes Before” Resolution. Instead of leaving at the time I think I will leave, I will try and leave 10 minutes before that. THIS IS BIG FOR ME, PEOPLE. I will also try and stop procrastinating so much… Try.
• The “Grow More” Resolution. While in college, before 2011, I never focused on growing. I went through the motions, tried to get through the classes, danced for fun, went out to be social, and basically… just did whatever came next. Never really stopped to try and take something out of each experience. Then came along my decision to study abroad during Spring ‘11 and my decision to really live in Fall ‘11. I have finally begun to see growth and positive change in me as a person and I don’t want to stop now. This year, I’m going to focus on growing rather than doing and really be alive this year.
• The “Figure out what I’m going to do after graduation” Resolution. Even if it’s something temporary, even if it means simply “moving back down to Socal” - whatever it is, I need to sit down and really try and figure it out. I’ve been putting it off out of fear. I just got to face it, clean up my resume, and start showing the world who’s boss again.

Questionable Category:

• Find a “sense of urgency”. Yeah, sorry Queens, not gonna happen.
• Figure out what I want to do with my life. Baby steps.
• Find love. As in, yes, that kind of love. Haven’t talked about it publicly in a while and… don’t know if I can talk about it still. Haha; it’s just kind of nerve racking topic to explore and embarrassing to admit whether I want it or not. Either way, maybe 2012 will be a new year for me. New hope, new encounters! Just got to do me and the rest will follow.

As I was talking to my mommy and sister over dinner tonight - 2012 is going to be a big year for me. Spring 2012 is my last semester as an undergraduate student - potentially the last semester as a student ever. There is no way in hell I’m not going to make the best of it. TAKE ALL THAT BERKELEY OFFERS. Key note speakers, campus facilities, career center, RSF, Strawberry Canyon (take me!), Lawrence Hall of Science (let’s go!), Indian Rock (I don’t even know where this is!), Rose Garden (photoshoot anyone?!), North Side, East, West, South Side, all the yummy places of the world, SF day trips, SF night trips, clubbing galore, bars galore, Oakland exploring, Mission exploring, Bart exploring - okay basically bringing apeshitcray to Berks. Jump on this bandwagon. I’m graduating. Shit. Summer 2012, to commemorate my graduation, you think I’m not going out with a bang? Oh hail no. Jump on this bandwagon. Plans for the future. I might always be lost, I might always say that I don’t know what I want to do next, and I might not have the answers; but one thing I do have, is faith in myself. I might not know what I’m doing after graduation, but I will not go down without a fight. I will send in resumes, go out on interviews, make the most of my connections - whatever I have to do to ensure that all my work has not been for naught. I was scared before, but I’m slowly feeling the panic turning into excitement for all the possibilities waiting for me. Maybe it’s good that I don’t know what I want to do next; that means I have so many more choices to choose from and so many roads to explore! JUMP. ON. THIS. BANDWAGON!

TWENTY TWELVE, I’M EXCITED!

“Accept your past without regrets, handle your present with confidence, and face your future without fear.” Lehgo.